Gestational Age of Baby T: 39 weeks and 5 days (as of December 21)
UPDATE: AGE OF BABY T - 15 days (as of 5 Jan - time of writing!!!!!!!)
Family,
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| Spoiler Alert - we have another daughter!!! |
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| Who is already Tarheel born and bred... |
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| GO HORNETS! |
12/1 - Team Taylor started K's advent calendar! Poor thing had been staring at it for at least a week, and so when she ran into my room after her nap, she gave me a hug and immediately asked for it. Too cute! Side note - isn't it amazing how, when you tell a kid "You can do it after your nap," they ALWAYS remember and ask for it immediately? Also, we opened the matching PJ's from Vol Nana and Grand Pooh! This year's set is even complete with a onesie for Baby T, and if the temperatures keep going this way, he/she will certainly need it!12/2 - JT HIT TERM TODAY!!!!! 37 weeks!!!! I mean, how is that even possible?!?!?!?!? This was a HUGE milestone for us given how early K came. We were hoping and praying to hit December, and so this was a tremendous release. We were a bit surprised to learn (upon opening Baby Center) that 37 weeks is apparently no longer term, but hey - it was when we grew up AND when we had Kaitlyn, so it counts in our book! Baby T is apparently the size of a swiss chard today...whatever that is (#jicama).
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| Pajama gram from Vol Nana! |
As for the goose, she ran into my room today in jeans and a pony tail, and could NOT believe how grown up she looked. I know I am biased, but that kid is absolutely beautiful. We think she's in a growth spurt right now, and she is eating everything not bolted to the floor (regardless of the amount of exercise that day). What I will say - we had heard that the new preschool (make sure you don't call it a daycare or K will correct you, as "daycare is for babies") really focused on play, and we think that's true because K comes home EXHAUSTED. JT has also figured out why K is not eating all her lunch at pre-school - they eat at lot earlier (like 11:30) vs. 12:30 at the other place. It's all good, as K crushes her lunch on the ride home.
One thing that's been really cute is how K kisses my cheek when she gives me a last hug before running out of the office. It's so deliberate how she makes eye contact and then swings around to my cheek. Love that kid!
We hit the Prosperity Park tree lighting on this night, and K had a blast hanging out with Taley. Jenny had been with Teresa and Taley at the park earlier that day, and she said it was the first time she'd actually seen K truly playing with another kid. K really does like Taley, as she followed her EVERYWHERE that night at the tree lighting (and back at their house in Taley's room). Cute!
12/3 - Team Taylor opened their annual pajama gram from Vol Nana today, and all I can say is TOO CUTE! There was even a onesie for Baby T - TBD whether or not it would fit when we received it, of course!
On the Kaitlyn front, she is really starting to play and be inventive with her toys. It's been really interesting to watch her in the bonus room and in our living room, and it was quite fascinating to watch her playing with Taylie last night.
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| Chillin' with the Williams clan before seeing Santa at the Sports Club. |
Dinner that evening was over at Jill & Neal's, where K played pretty good with the girls. She was a little tired and fussy, but a lot of that has been the complete elimination of naps (because truth be told she still needs one every day). Also, she was obsessed with borrowing a Princess book from them, and that's all she focused on for most of the time there. However, she eventually did start playing with the girls, and it was cute to watch them interact. For my part, I'm trying to push her more toward playing with other kids (vs. adults), as I want her to learn those social skills. She really is starting to interact and use her imagination with them, which has been awesome to watch.
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| It's all about the cookie. |
12/4 - K opened her present from "Mr. Richard and family" today - 10 books from the author of the Gruffalo! She absolutely LOVED it and is LOVING reading the books. That night we read Cave Baby (cute) and Room on the Broom (fantastic - one of my new faves).We spent that afternoon hanging out with Mindy and Craig at their house. K was in Heaven, as she got to play with Hayden. They really are cute together, and it does feel like they fall into a rhythm of play and interaction fairly quickly. As I type this, I realize I am penning a recurring theme of socialization, independence, and growth. Perhaps I've been fixated on it because I know my time (or knew I should say) would soon be further disseminated and fragmented, requiring K become more independent with occupying her free time. Perhaps it is just the next milestone that is tangible to me and therefore the one I'm most acutely aware of in the run up to Kindergarten - a date in the not too distant future which represents the moment she'll spend more time in the classroom with other kids than she will with her own family. Or perhaps it's just a desire to see her happy, learning new things and growing in imagination, thought, and experience. Whatever it is, I am happy to see her recognizing and starting to connect with so many kids her age.
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| Making "Bennett Burritos" at Jill's. |
12/5 - K didn't sleep good the previous evening and woke up coughing, which was a first sign indicator to me and Jenny that the meds (10 days of amoxicillin) might not be working. However, she clearly didn't have the chills, as she took off ALL HER CLOTHES at nap time and slept NAKED! I mean, that has NEVER happened - HILARIOUS! There are other signs she's not kicked the infection, however, as she does like to snuggle and rest more than normal. We have been curling up and watching a lot of Goldie & Bear lately. She will always ask, "Can I curl up with you?" She'll then get in the crook of my arm, put her head on my chest, and start sucking that thumb. I mean, could life really be any better?
12/6 - Today was a GREAT DAY. Jenny and K just stayed home all day and took it easy. They read, played, watched TV, and just enjoyed being around one another. This was one of those days you just want to take and hold in your mind forever - especially knowing that the world is about to forever change. With that lens on it, it was a really, really special day. The girls had dinner at Chik-fil-A with Megan but had a play date before - it was like a herd of elephants running downstairs (I was upstairs working at the time).
The side note - mom wrote me an email and said she sent "the kids" a package. It was the first time I'd seen my progeny pluralized. CRAZY!!!!!
12/7 - So Jenny FINALLY saw Dr. Bowles today. Talk about a long wait! She had cancelled on JT the previous FOUR times, and we honestly didn't think we'd get to this point to see her! I was with K when Jenny called and gave me the update - 2.5 centimeters dilated and 60% effaced!!!! HB was 156, so Baby T wasn't giving anything away at that point. Dr. Bowles told JT to expect spotting in the next couple of days and even said that she might see her on Monday at the hospital. That put us in hyperdrive - it's really happening!!!
The other fun activity was "Birthday Tea with Taylie" over at Theresa's house. As it was Taylie's
K had a great swim lesson that night (she's largely getting private lessons at the group price), but the cough was even worse and continued all night (same thing happened the night before). So we will be keeping an eye on that one to see if we need some second line antibiotics.
The classic quote for the day: I asked K how she enjoyed music class at preschool, and her response: "It wasn't very good. All we did was sing." LOVE. IT. Stop the cuteness.
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| A little creepy...but still cute. |
12/8 - So I want to share a God encounter on this day. As mentioned earlier, K's coughing has been terrible, and she'd been sleeping poorly (and keeping us up as well since we had the monitor on). Last night we laid hands on her and prayed for a good night's sleep, and WOW - she slept 8 hours straight with ZERO coughing that night. She was up at 3:45 and needed some medicine, but it was purely God who helped her (and us) sleep that night.
JT took her to the doctor and confirmed that she now has a viral infection. Consequently, we kept her home and just watched movies and hung out. She was absolutely knackered and took a 2 hour nap (and still went to be early that night). We spent most of December on a steady diet of cough meds, antibiotics, ibuprofen, and Benadryl. Lucky for us, our kid LOVES medicine and how it tastes. Seriously - we are two VERY lucky parents.
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| K's first nail job! |
Also, a pre-Christmas package arrived from Vol Nana today, complete with more Hallmark story books and other good stuff. Let's just say that we've now got Jingle and Bell in our collection - AND they can bark/howl/talk to each other. It really is pretty cool.
12/10 - In shock that we still had a Saturday as a party of three, Team Taylor decided to get brekkie as a family. We rolled over to the Famous Toastery, where all the staff took predictions on the gender of the child and when JT would deliver. K loved it and carried Jingle around with her everywhere. As a side note, K has officially (in my mind) made Littlefoot (whom she calls Twink) her favorite animal. He goes with her EVERYWHERE - the dinner table, the sink to brush her teeth, the car, restaurants, her bed - you name it. She absolutely LOVES that little sauropod (and knows that it is a sauropod, which I find AWESOME), and it's so cute to a) see her playing with something that was mine from 30 years ago and b) see her carrying around an animal that's almost as big as she is.  |
| Check out those toes! |
We also hit Publix (we basically go here every day now, as K gets a balloon and a cookie each time - #HEAVEN) before coming home to just relax. We did go to Church that night, where I joined the prayer team up front for the first time ever. I wasn't asked to pray for anyone, which is probably a good thing, as I was a deer in headlights up there!
K has become a big fan of the "Hippopotamus for Christmas" song and can now actually sing parts of it (Beth would be so pleased). It's been the YouTube song request during lotion the last 3 nights.
12/11 - so the whole family was feeling pretty rough, and we just all stayed home this day. Yep - as exciting as it sounds... :-)
12/13 - My note today was that Team Taylor is definitely in the waiting game! Jan actually came the last two nights, as Jenny had felt some pain (likely contractions), and we wanted to ensure that someone was here in the event we needed to head to the hospital on short notice. It has been an odd feeling these last couple of days, as it almost feels like we are just in a holding pattern, standing with a foot on either side of a void. However, as uncomfortable (a better description is awkward and anxious I think) as it feels, I am truly thankful for this extra time, as it's allowed us all to get healthy ahead of Baby T's arrival. Up to this point, it has been 2-3 consecutive weeks of sickness, so the noticeable absence of coughing and tissues in the trashcan is a welcome sight. On the Kaitlyn front, she's been pretending to be a pirate a lot lately. I've quite enjoyed the "laddie/lassie" banter, as it's given me a chance to use some of my "funny voices" while playing with her. And when in doubt, I can always just say "Arrrrrrrgh, matey" and get a smile out of her. :-) Also, she started to memorize Room on the Broom and Hippopotamus for Christmas - too cute! My side note on this day was that I didn't feel I'd done a good job scribing events, funny moments, and activities in December (especially given the criticality of recording this period of our lives). It's funny to read that note as I type it all now - especially looking at all the pages of scribbles I've got to record everything that's transpired in the past few weeks.
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| Christmas Program at Preschool (UCUMC). |
12/14 - Jt went to the doctor again today. They told her that Baby T is sitting very low - actually as low as you can go without being in the birth canal! This was good to know, as JT has been concerned on occasion with the amount of movement (or lack thereof) from Baby T. Heartbeat was 152, and she was dilated 3 cm. The nurse told her that she was now 80% effaced, but on a funny note - we later found out the nurse was wrong and JT hadn't effaced any since her previous week's visit to Dr. Bowles.
Speaking for JT (but I think she would agree if she were reading this), she feels a bit stressed and anxious at this point. I think all the waiting, the sickness, and the pain are taking a toll on her. We are off the map here, as K was already 2 weeks old at this point. I am actually sleeping in the spare on occasion these days, as JT is taking up quite a bit of the bed and is snoring. Don't judge me. :-) Oh, and K named her dino "Russellville Hornet" today. However, since that moment I can confirm we are using Twink all the time at this point, so I am treating that as the official name. It was cute - K actually took Littlefoot to her visit with Dr. Knutson a few weeks back. When Knutson walked in, she said, "Is that your dino?" K looked at her and replied, "No, it's a sauropod." LOVE THAT KID!!!! Oh, and Hippopotamus for Christmas is now officially memorized. Check.
12/15: So K woke up complaining of an ear ache today, which means that we will be BACK at the Peds again tomorrow. It's really been amazing - first the bacterial, then the viral, and now this. I know 'tis the season, but it feels like that poor girl is sick all the time! But she's a trouble, and it was nothing a little ibuprofen couldn't fix. :-)
On the Baby front, JT told me that she definitely felt some new pains today - especially in the back. She has been hilarious - walking around the house and bouncing to try and "speed things up." The funniest part of all this. Everyone, and I mean EVERYONE - has told us that the only way to speed up the process is to do what got Jenny that way in the first place. It is honestly HILARIOUS how many folks - especially our church peeps - have recommended it to us. Guys, let me just be honest for a minute. I LOVE my wife. She is smokin' hot. But right now, between the baby, the sickness, the snoring, and the exhaustion, that is just not gonna happen. :-)
And it was confirmed - K has an ear infection. They put her on second line antibiotics - augmentin this time. Oh, and in other news - OUR DOWNSTAIRS HEAT WENT OUT ON THIS DAY, WHICH WAS THE COLDEST DAY OF THE YEAR. Luckily the guy made it out before the sun went down and fixed it quickly, but it was MISERABLE for most of the day.
So back to the augmentin - I've told you in times previous that K LOVES meds, right? Well, the bottle of augmentin was HUGE, and you could see K's excitement - 10 days of this goodness 2x daily. And so it was with that sheer exuberance that she opened wide for the first of 20 6.5 ml does of this miracle elixir. But instead of the wonderful taste of all previous meds, this stuff must have tasted like curdled concrete, as K instantly scrunched her face and started clawing at her tongue. HILARIOUS! We managed to get it down, but let's just say she's now on a steady diet of Hershey's kisses as well as augmentin (she gets one - morning or evening - whenever she takes the medicine). Actually, with the kisses, she's now come to look forward to the experience. We'll say, "It's time for medicine!" She'll then say, "Yuck!" but get so excited about the chocolate that she'll suck it down (and it's funny to watch her hold her nose).
12/17 - So K is now meowing a lot. Full disclosure - I DO NOT, DO NOT, DO NOT like it when people act like cats (no idea why I have this aversion), and so I have had to power through this a bit. The good news is that, while it has occurred quite often recently, the bouts are at least quite short. The trickiest part is confirming whether or not it's LBJ, Emmy, Graybel, Charlie, Meukers, or one of the other TN kitties.
So being totally shocked that we had this day free, we again packed it in. K was actually up at 5:12, but she did manage to go back to sleep. We started at Toast before shuffling over to Publix, where Santa was in residence! It was AWESOME, as K got to see Santa again, got her free candy cane (it was a big one), and even got her face painted (and we are talking REALLY painted). I mean, it was GREAT. Publix really IS the spot where shopping is a pleasure. :-
We then went to the library, where we just got a chance to hang out and relax. It was cute, as we colored book marks and read some stories, and K even got to play on the computer a little bit (it was a coloring game, and she LOVES clicking the mouse). The highlight for me was reading the book "You Were the First," a book about the first born in any family. It was SO SWEET and SO TRUE, and I had to really work to keep it together. I was teary eyed at the library, and then I REALLY had to fight off the tears the next night while reading to K before bed. The line "You were the first to teach us how to be parents" just tore at my heart strings.K is loving playing the "Big Bad" game at the moment, which basically consists of me chasing her while she pretends to have muffins for Granny (and in this case, granny is Jenny sitting on the couch). Occasionally I'll steal one of the muffins so that she'll have to chase me, but either way, it's a lot of running around the house (and is quite cute).
Side note - I am reading "Parenting By the Book" at the moment (have since finished it). Overall, I didn't really enjoy it, but I am taking the bit about letting my yes be yes and no be no a bit more seriously now. I will give the book credit, as I do think I'm seeing results on that front. However, given all the parenting and lifestyle books that I'm reading now, I do want to remember to just let me gut and conscience be my primary guide. God has given us the playbook and will help us along - we just need to remember to ask Him for help. 
12/19 - K had a party at Preschool today, so Jenny went and hung out with her for a bit. The good news for us - one month in, K really, REALLY seems to love her new preschool. She is talking about school much more, has a group of friends that she talks about (Kate with the braid, Aubrey, and a few others I can't remember). She seems to really be making friends and interacting, and I'm definitely getting more information about each day. She's actually asking for a braid every single day because one of the girls in the class - Kate - always has a braid. And the funniest part - if she gets their and Kate's hair is down, she immediately pulls her braid out and lets her hair down. Kate also wears a "pigtail" (pony tail), and sometimes K asks for that. Full disclosure - I don't know how to braid or put her hair in a ponytail, so that is 100% JT's department.
12/20 - So I didn't see a lot of my girls today, as JT and K spent the entire day together making it count. They hit DPK and Chik-fil-A and had a blast.12/21 - JT actually jumped in surprise this morning (we were in the kitchen) due to a "gush." We thought her water might have broken, but we didn't see any subsequent signs (I'll spare you all the details - let's just say there was a lot going on down there :-)). After she had some further tightening later that day (her stomach was "squaring up" - I didn't even know that was a thing, but it really does happen!), she texted me and asked me to accompany her to her appointment (it was with Dr. Bowles). We ended up with me not going (I took K to swim lessons), but I was obviously on high alert! I mean, we'd been on pins and needles for two weeks at that point, as her previous appointment with Dr. Bowles was the appt where she told JT that she'd likely see spotting in the next couple of days!
The appointment was at 2 pm, and all looked good. She was still just 60% effaced (the nurse had been wrong the previous week) and only 3.5 cm dilated (HB was 156). Dr. Bowles performed the process of "stripping the membranes," which is apparently a very common thing for women who've hit term (they didn't even ask JT if she wanted it - they just did it). Apparently it's meant to "jumpstart" labor in women who's bodies are ready. I will be honest and say I'm not really sure the mechanics everything, but apparently it does help aggravate the baby and get things moving again (especially helpful for kids like Baby T who are very comfortable in there!).
They also talked about induction and talked about scheduling something for 12/27. However, as it wouldn't have been "medically necessary" until 1 week past the due date, we knew that the reality was we couldn't schedule/do anything until 12/30. I will be honest and say this concerned me, as I hated the thought of having to foot a portion of the bill in 2017. But it was in that moment that I realized I was not focused on the right things. Instead of being thankful for the miracle and giving it all to God for his perfect timing, I'd been anxious and trying to control the final phases of the pregnancy. Instead of acknowledging He was in control and would bring Baby T forth as part of the Grand Design, I was instead feeding JT spicy food, talking induction, and basically trying to think about what we could do to influence the outcome. Since conception (and even before that), we'd given it all to God, and I couldn't believe that at this late hour I was now trying to wrestle some of the control from the one who gave us this rainbow baby in the first place. And so, just before driving to NOMAD for K's swimming lesson, I raised this final chapter of the pregnancy to God. All I asked was that Baby T would come this year. Instead of spicy food, talk of sex to efface the membrane, massages, I just asked God to grant us another miracle to end this journey. And let me tell you, dear reader - God hears AND ANSWERS all prayers.
At 8:08 PM, JT started having pains that were different from anything she'd experienced before. She knew they were contractions, and she started timing them. Then, about 9 PM, her water broke. Just like that, we'd gone from being anxious and thinking about induction to knowing that we were now in the 24 hour or less countdown to baby! In retrospect, it was all part of God's perfect timing. That day I had just finished my last deliverables with work, we were all FINALLY healthy, and it was late enough that Jan (Jenny's mom) was home but not so late that she was asleep. We called Bradford, and they told us it was go time. We then called Jan, and about 75 minutes later, she rocked up with her bags. And speaking of - I hadn't yet packed my bag, and so I went into hyperdrive to throw stuff together.
So this post will go long at this point, as the next moments (and days, of course) were a flood and blur of emotions. The first emotion was pure elation and shock as we realized that the rainbow baby for which we'd been praying for was finally about to arrive hearthside. All the tears, all the stress, all the prayers, everything - was about to culminate with the arrival of Baby T. The rainbow baby was here. God ALWAYS makes good on His promises.
Right before we left, I walked into K's room. She was sound asleep - the picture of peace. I got teary-eyed and wanted to just freeze that moment forever. We were leaving that house a family of 3. We would return a family of 4. And while there was never a question in my mind that it would change everything for the better, the reality was that her reality was about to undeniably change. As an only child, I knew I was completely ill equipped to prepare her for this, but I was resolved to make this transition as smooth as possible. But this moment wasn't about that transition. This moment wasn't about the future. This moment was about the past. It was about a girl who came into my life on March 11, 2013 and changed everything. It was a girl who turned my heart from clay to butter, who helped make our house a home, and who gave and had given me endless moments of joy, laughter, happiness, and peace in my soul. It was a moment to look at her in all that peace and think about where we've been and where we're going, and remember how blessed we've been and are. Kaitlyn, whenever you read this, just know how special that moment was for your father, how you have forever changed me for the better, and how much daddy loves you.
On the way out the door, JT had a great idea - she wrote a letter to K, explaining why she was waking up to find Nole Nana and not her parents in the house. JT had purchased a Princess activity book just that day for this big moment - talk about great timing! Bags packed, we then said goodbye to Jan and hopped in the car, arriving at Prseby-Main about 10:40 or so. It was all decorated for Christmas, which was really, really cool! We were admitted about 11 PM, where they did the amniotic fluid test and confirmed that yes, JT's water really had broken, which meant that we weren't walking out of that building without a baby! One very cool thing was the Christmas tree at the admissions desk that had ornaments of baby's feet on it. It was pretty cool to think that very soon we'd have a munchkin's footprint on that tree as well (the only question was pink or blue construction paper)! Dr. Steven Moore was on call, and he came in to check on JT about 11:30 or so. He evaluated her, said the contractions were about 10 minutes apart, and felt she'd likely need Pitosin to really get going. JT said that she wanted to wait and see what transpired, and he said we were good to wait a couple of hours and see how she progressed. With that backdrop, we were moved to our labor and delivery room, where we met our nursing staff, put on some Christmas music, and began the waiting game. There was something truly surreal about hearing "Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire" while also hearing your wife groan with labor pain.
So to further set the scene - Team Taylor was exhausted. We'd been up all day, I'd run 7 miles, and we started preparing to drive to the hospital in the window where we normally start prepping for bed. However, the energy was good...all the way up until JT asked the nurse how far apart the contractions were. When the nurse looked at the tape and said, "About 3 minutes," JT and I were shocked. She asked for the epidural immediately, and they started the IV drip. She needed 1 bag of fluids and needed her bloodwork to come back, but they felt we'd have plenty of time. Oh, how wrong they were....
So let me just go ahead and get to the good stuff - JT's contractions suddenly started going like a rocket. The groans turned to shouts, and then the shouts turned into screams. Readers, I really can't imagine how awful it was for JT, but for my part I can tell you that it was horrific being helpless to comfort JT as all this transpired. The needle in her hand had been terrible to start the IV, but the epidural during contractions 2 minutes apart, was, well - one of the worst things I've ever watched. The guy missed the spinal tap the first time (not his fault, obviously), and pain shot down Jenny's leg. Then her pain was excruciating as the guy threaded the needle and catheter into her back, which was made worse by the fact that he had to stop midway through when contractions hit. It was so bad that we had to put her over on her side, at which point JT had TONS of pressure, fluid started gushing, she was screaming, and the nurses said, "Page Dr. Moore." 10 minutes later he was in there, and I looked at the epidural machine. It said, "Pump has been inactive 10 minutes." Let me translate that for you - JENNY WAS ABOUT TO GO INTO LABOR AND HAVE A NATURAL DELIVERY. I obviously didn't mention the fact that the pump was inactive, but when Jenny looked at Dr. Moore and said, "The drugs are gonna work, right?" and he said, "Yes, but it won't be as deep as what you normally feel," I knew we were in trouble.
So, the bad news - I've never heard screams like that. JT was an ANIMAL who basically had a natural birth. The good news - it was LIGHTNING quick, and at 2:23 AM on December 22, I had the privilege of cutting the cord and then announcing to Jenny that arrival of our NEW MIRACLE - CORA ELLEN TAYLOR - weighting in at 7 lb and 4 oz (19.5 inches long). She cried almost immediately, and they put her right on JT's chest (slime and all). She started feeding great, and just like that - we were a party of 4. JT and I were in shock for so many reasons. Honestly, because EVERY SINGLE ASPECT of this pregnancy had been different, I think we both thought we'd have a boy. Also, as we never expected that kind of delivery, we both looked like we had PTSD. But between the sweet little cry (her little chin just quivered!) and the elation/relief of having our baby girl hearthside, it was just an incredible moment.
Cora came out hot pink like a suckling pig with deep purple feet. She had strawberry blonde hair and the cutest little angled chin you could ever imagine. She fed for about an hour until it was bath time (first bath was about 5:30), and the first eval of C was about 6:40 (said she looked perfect).
The recap in pictures...
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| Step 1: Admission and confirmation - it's GO TIME!!!! |
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| Step 2: All smiles because Jenny still thinks she'll get a working epidural... |
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| Step 3: Welcome to the Planet, Cora Ellen!!!!! |
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| Step 4: Shock & Awe...and a 7 lb miracle. |
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| Step 5: The calm after the storm. |
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| Step 6: Cora begs to be put back in Jenny. |
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| Step 7: First Bath (she enjoyed it as much as her face suggests). |
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| Step 8: In daddy's arms for the first time. |
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| Step 9: First Diaper change and sleep in the bassinet. |
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| Step 10: Add our ornament to the tree (now in the Baby Book!) |
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| Step 11: The Siblings meet. |
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| Step 12: Let the love begin to grow. |
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| One of the nurses made this beanie and was handing them out - how cool! |
12/23 - so this kid pooped 4 times this day, and let me tell you - THE MENICONIUM WAS JUST AS DISGUSTING AS I REMEMBERED. The difference - I didn't have to ring the call button for help this time! But MAN, did that kid fill a diaper with black sludge. She slept on my from 5-6:30 PM, and Lindsey came to hang with us for a little bit in the morning (brought coffee!).
On that morning I felt very at peace. We'd had tons of well wishes, and we got flowers from my work crew (very nice of them). I had told K I would be there when she woke up, so I did hate I wasn't true to my word there. However, I couldn't leave JT (and was SO glad I stayed through that night). I will say that this room was better - the couch certainly seemed bigger, and I was able to rest a bit more than I did with K. The lactation consultant came by and said that things looked to be progressing well. JT was producing colostrum, and Cora had a strong latch. On that day, we were hopeful that JT wouldn't have to pump! Spoiler alert - it has NOT worked out quite that way. :-)On the Cora front, her neck is already SO strong! She can hold her head up already...even if she's got
the occasional rollerball head that snaps back or slams into my clavicle. Cora passed her audio test (this was really cool - basically they put headphones on her and checked to see when her brain responded to impulses to each ear. It was awesome!), and all signs pointed to a Saturday morning discharge (SUCH good news). We didn't have to do the oxygen test this go around, as Cora was term.
I drove home for a bit to see K that day, and when I told her I was bringing Cora and mommy home on Christmas Eve, she said, "Then we'll be a team of four!" I mean, that's pretty darn cute, right?
Cora slept most of the day this day after the cluster feed. She continued transitioning her stools, and honestly things just went well. Holding her that morning and watching the sunrise out the window, the reality finally hit me: the miracle - the rainbow baby - for which we and so many others had prayed was here. The birth plan did not go according to schedule, we were exhausted, and we were in uncharted territory (I was an only child, so this was all new to me), but we were all together, and in 24 hours we'd be
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| Look familiar? :-) |
12/24 - Christmas Eve and discharge day! Cora was down 8% of her body weight, which was still in tolerance. However, as they were concerned Cora might not be getting enough food (turns out that was the case), JT had to start pumping. This was a bit of a gut punch, as we really thought we were going to dodge that bullet this go-around. The good news was that Cora had only lost 2 oz since the first weigh-in, which suggested that things were trending in the right direction. And selfishly, I like it when she pumps, as it means I get to help with feeding.
The drive home was easy until we stopped to pick up JT's prescription at CVS. I stayed in the car with Cora, and I noticed some bubbling spit in her mouth. I used the suction to try and clear the spit, and WOW DID THIS CHILD HAVE THE WORLD'S LARGEST COLOSTRUM SPIT UP. I mean, she SOAKED her outfit (I had to change her). Needless to say JT came out and wondered WHAT happened. Side note - this kid is ALL ABOUT dropping some steamers. She's definitely my kid!
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| I am including the photo of Cora screaming because, well, she does a LOT of screaming. |
The day was good. So good, in fact, that K and I even went to Christmas Eve service at Freedom House! K was in the worship center with me, and it was SO CUTE to see her with her hand up worshipping Jesus. Too cute! I was riding a high at that moment - our family was complete, both children were healthy, and my Paternity leave had just started in earnest. I had a strong sense of purpose and peace that day, determined to make every moment count and find purpose in ever moment.
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| She also makes that face often... |
Oh, and K has already memorized the Big Sister book - too cute! Also, the best conversation of the day:
Sammy the Bull: "We have to leave out brownies for Santa."
Kaitlyn the Munchkin: "I don't want to leave him anything, dada."
Sammy the Bull: "If you don't leave him anything, he won't leave you anything."
Kaitlyn the Munchkin: (thinking...thinking...thinking...) "Let's leave him a brownie."
PRICELESS!!!!
This 24 hour period was much different than the previous one. I was exhausted, and I realized that I needed to relearn TONS of stuff. Add in the fact that K never screamed or protested out of the gate (she was a sleepyhead), and all the screams were a bit unnerving for me. Then throw in an older sibling on Christmas morning, and you have the trimmings of a busy day. :-)
Looking back at Christmas, it was truly wonderful. We had some special time with K - opening gifts, looking at what Santa brought, etc - and on this day we started trying to learn/figure out what a routine would look like giving quality time to both of them - both separately and together. I managed a window of skin-to-skin with Cora, and I changed multiple poopy diapers! Seriously - this kid can BLOW IT OUT. Impressive. :-)
In looking at my notes from the day, I noted that it was really tough to process all the emotions. I definitely felt like I was reeling much of the time in the hospital, and I did have a fear that I was just being too matter of fact vs. taking the time to soak in the enormity of what was happening and enjoying this special time (you'll notice I worry about this as a theme). So finally this evening I just sat and watched Cora sleeping for the first time. It's a much different vantage point when a child - your own or otherwise - isn't red faced and screaming at you, and I couldn't help but notice how beautiful she was. It had been so crazy busy up until that moment - Christmas, the hospital, life in general - and that moment was a chance to just stop, take a breath, and take stock in everything. Mentally I was (and am) exhausted, as everything about this period right now feels completely different than the period with K. True, I'm sure I blocked a lot of that out, and also - we now have another munchkin to keep an eye on. I know that worry and guilt of splitting time appropriately is weighing on me, and so I'm raising up to God my prayers that I will be the parent both need while also carving out time for God, myself, and Jenny.
12/26 - So Team Taylor did something unthinkable today - we tried a pacifier on our daughter. I mean, I have ALWAYS been anti-pacifier, and K was never interested. Cora, however, was ALL ABOUT IT, and it made a WORLD of difference. Seriously - She went from nuclear meltdown to calm in about .000007 seconds, all the while wearing that poor little bit of plastic out! It's helped us get closer to the Babywise schedule, which has been nice and is helping us organize our day slightly better. Side note about feeding - given all the spit ups and what we perceived to be gassiness, a friend of ours (Lindsey) thought we might be overfeeding C, as the eating could be covering any burn from reflux (we also wanted to understand why our child is deucing every 10 minutes, as she has a RAW bum).
Last night was really tough, as Cora put on a screaming show I'd never seen before. Full disclosure, I was in a dark place - angry, frustrated that I couldn't solve the problem, and just generally surly in my behavior and vocabulary. I know I'm exhausted, but that's no excuse (as I tell K all the time). I was disappointed in my actions, but luckily a walk this afternoon helped clear my head and get me back into proper frame of mind. I also got a run in at NOMAD, and that was LIFE CHANGING for me. The run felt like normalcy in a period that has very little of that, and it highlighted how much I'm struggling with finding balance and adjusting to the new schedule. As I type this (18 Jan at this point), there is a reality that I'm still struggling with the schedule but getting better. I now realize that I can't just pour all the old activities and timing into the new world order, and I'm finally adjusting. It was a painful process, but I am happy to report that I'm getting there. I am also realizing that I can't be all things to all people (not that I ever was, but I do think I was trying to over-compensate). God actually dropped the right book in my lap - Present Over Perfect - and I think that has helped me really think about what I can (and can't) do.
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| #Best.Photo.EVER. |
The cries were softer (at least it felt) throughout the day, and she seemed to sleep better throughout the afternoon. That gave me a chance to sit and watch her again, which I'm trying to do more of each day. Also, this kid can BURP! We barely used burp cloths with K, but we need full body armor with this girl! YOWSERS!
Also, K and I got out - just the two of us - and went to NOMAD for a swim. It was like old times, and it was just great. She and I were in the water playing like we always do, and it was like we were the only two people in the world. It was special to me, and I think it really meant a lot to her as well. Oh, and lastly - thanks to the Hitman clan for the Burt's Bees Baby gear. We realized we actually didn't have much down from the attic or washed in Cora's size, so this was a life saver!
12/27 - Today was the first car ride as a family of 4! We actually got off on time and went a whopping 2ish miles to the Peds, where Cora had her first ever appointment! Everything looked great, but they told us that we needed to keep pumping, as Cora hadn't made it back to her birth weight. The doctor didn't seem concerned (she was still at an 8% loss), but they felt it prudent to keep pumping until at least the 2 week appointment. Also, thanks to the Wild Wallaby and the Pool Shark for the beautiful flowers!
12/28 - We visited a lactation consultant today, and our minds were blown: Cora actually wasn't getting enough food! THAT'S why she'd been screaming! JT and I were stunned, as we thought she was sucking great, draining her, and eating often/for long periods, but apparently she wasn't getting enough. This was a little deflating for us, as we really had hoped we wouldn't have to pump (at least not as often) this go around. It was really just another shock to the system for us, especially given how often Jenny was pumping and how little she was producing. We thought the small volume meant Cora was emptying her, but apparently it was quite the opposite. This was really fascinating, but it got to the point that I had to drive out at 9:20 PM to go and get formula! I'm glad we did, as otherwise Cora would have been starving (she took 35 ml's after being on JT). Poor Jenny is doing EVERYTHING she possibly can at this point, but until the milk really starts flowing, she's unfortunately stuck to pumping every 3 hours and we're having to supplement with formula (Similac once again!).  |
| The nursery (aka my office). |
The funny thing is that, despite this bad news, it actually was a good thing for me, as it helped me focus and gave me something to fix. Before this moment, I had been reeling and trying to figure out what was wrong, but now I had something that I could work on correcting and solving. In that moment, I hoped this would rectify some of my churlish behavior (for which I had already apologized to both K and C). I have said it above, but Sammy the Bull clearly did next expect this onslaught of emotion, exhaustion, and frustration. However, with a renewed sense of purpose, I did feel better.
And there were other great moments from the day. While JT was at the appointment, I took K to DPK, where she CRUSHED the Rock Wall - she was SO CUTE bouldering across it. She looked like her mommy in Thailand! Also, she had a terrific swim lesson. That evening K actually asked to have the Dohm (white noise maker) back in her room, as Cora's crying had apparently been keeping her up at night. Truth be told, I think the whole house is exhausted, and I resolved this night to find ways to get more sleep.
The family pic gallery:
12/29 - Making good on the last sentence from above, JT and I slept through our alarm and actually slept 4 straight hours! And while that wasn't ideal for Cora's schedule, she was still out and WE FELT GREAT!!!!! On this day, Cora started taking both boobs plus 2 oz of formula at each feeding. And while it was nuts to watch and we wondered at first where she put it, we then started noticing some killer rolls forming. She's gaining, baby!!!!! BOOYAH!!!!!
#1: K is playing with her flip phone, and Jan asks who's she's calling. K's response: "Vol Nana."
#2: Dad is visiting, and we are driving back from her swim lesson. Dad says, "I love you, Kaitlyn." Her response: "I love Vol Nana." PRICELESS. From the mouth of babes...
Cora was much better today and cried much less, so the formula is definitely helping to assuage her hunger. Also, K has been GREAT playing by herself all day - she was SO EXCITED for Vol Nana's visit (she and Steve arrived this day).
12/30 - So the night was brutal, but the morning was great. I fed her at 8:30 and then did skin to skin, so it was a good start to the day. My mantra for that day (and hopefully for this period) is to just simplify and enjoy. Mom and Steve took K to see Moana, so she was in Heaven!
12/31 - A dream come true for me today - my first ever UNCC game with K! Seriously, one of the reasons we moved up here was so we could be close to a big university and be able to attend events and games (like dad did for me with UT), and so this was a watershed moment. K LOVED it - from the bounce house to the doggie - frisbee show at half time to the pizza to the popcorn to just hanging out with Daddy, she thought the whole thing was great. And for my part, it was just a perfect, happy moment where a dad saw one of his visions with his daughter come true.  |
| All smiles. |
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| Tar heel born, baby!!!!! |
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| Chuuuuuuubby Buuuuuuunny!!!! |
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| First Family photo. :-) |
Chat with you all in the new year!
Love,
Sam and Jenny
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